Uhh... that would be a black leather boot, NOT a book hitting me in the face (nm)

Posted by Indiana James (Lambert) from 209.5.179.16 on September 23, 1999 at 15:19:24:

In Reply to: Chapter 4 of "The Lambert Bros. and the Quest for the 12 inch Indy Action figure"! posted by Indiana James (Lambert) on September 23, 1999 at 11:50:33:

: Alright! Here we go! Day 3 of this story's (err.. spoof's)
: serialization! Here is the fourth chapter! Happy reading!

: Chapter 4

: ROB T, still holding the Lambert brothers at gunpoint, he demanded
: answers from the pair. But, little did they know of the the
: mysterious galleon that silently crept up on the cruise ship.

: ěNow, hold on, let me explain--î James began to say but was cut off as
: a Chinese pirate, fully armed, entered the room. ROB T. quickly took
: aim at the pirate and gave a quick shot, which missed by about a foot.

: The surprised pirate aimed his rifle at ROB T.ís chest and quickly
: fired, bringing the Indy collectorís swift death.

: In a quick decision, James kicked the pirate in the midsection and
: knocked him down and out into the hallway. James rushed into the hall
: to continue the fight. The pirate struck back with a kick of his own,
: knocking James into the wall.

: Meanwhile, cries and screams could be heard all throughout the ship as
: dozens of Chinese pirates boarded the ship fully armed.

: Still in ROB T.ís cabin, Brett looked out of the wood slated window
: and gasped. ěPirates!!î

: Back in the hallway, the Chinese pirate had grabbed a railing, removed
: it from the bearings, broke it in half and with one in each hand,
: twirled them in the direction of James.

: Another pirate came in the direction of James. But this one already
: had an opponent, one of the sailors from the ship, and the sailor was
: losing big time. The other pirate kicked the sailor and he flew in
: between James and his opponent. Quickly, James kneed the sailorís
: opponent in the chest, snatched up his rifle and began twirling it at
: his stick-wielding pirate.

: Brett, meanwhile grabbed ROB T.ís gun. ěI hate not knowing what comes
: next!î Brett muttered as he went out the door and ran to the opposite
: end of the hallway of James and the pirate. Unfortunately, he ran
: straight into half a dozen rifle-bearing pirates.

: James and the pirate were still duking it out in the hall. After
: rigorously fighting with the sticks, James dropped the rifle, twirled
: around and kicked the pirate smack in the face. The pirate quickly
: recovered and swung a punch at James who quickly ducked. James tried
: to punch the pirate in the belly, but he shielded the bunch with his
: arm. The pirate swung around for another punch, but James blocked his
: punch as quickly as the pirate blocked his.

: On the deck of the ship, several crew members were having a gunfight
: with the pirates still on board their own vessel. The first mate
: fired his side arm and successfully hit one of the pirates in the
: head, and his body fell into the dark waters below.

: Meanwhile, James took the fight out on the ships decks. He flipped
: the pirate over, who surprisingly got back up. As soon as he got back
: up, the fedora-wearing James kicked him again and again in the face
: and the stomach, forcing him farther down the deck. James gave one
: final kick to the jaw, knocking him to the ground.

: Hehehe... I kicked some ass! James thought as he smirked.

: But that smile vanished as, out of nowhere, a black leather boot
: smacked him in the face. James fell down and rolled down the ramp and
: down into all the passengers and the pirates holding them at gunpoint.

: Walking down the stairs was Tessa, the singer and the black
: leather-clad figure who kicked James.

: As soon as James stood up, Brett ran over to him, Meg was there, too.
: He looked around as gun wielding pirates forced the passengers to
: forfeit their watches, jewels, wallets and paper clips.

: ěItís the singer!î Brett exclaimed.

: As Tessa continued to walk down the stairs, she began to speak.

: ěWe donít want to make your lives short. We just want your money,
: your jewels...î Tessa stopped walking and looked at all the frightened
: passengers, then continued her sentence,îyour gold. My name is Tessa,
: and this is my first mate, Goodsport!î Tessa pointed to a shirtless,
: brawny man with huge biceps.

: Goodsport walked forward (besides Tessa, he was the only pirate who
: was not Chinese). He flexed his arms for the passengers, who gawked
: as his muscles bulged bigger than anything they had ever seen before.
: Goodsport smiled as sweat dripped off his arms.

: ěHoly shit!î were the only two words that escaped Brettís mouth at the
: sight of this massive hulk.

: A pirate went to Meg and yanked her bag.

: ěNo! Itís mine!!î Meg screamed.

: Tessa, meanwhile, walked up to Indy Magnoli, reached in his shirt
: pocket, and silently pulled out a wad of money. Seeing this, Abner
: stepped forward. Tessa drew out her gun and shot poor Abner, who
: collapsed amidst many shrieks and hollars.

: Brett and James looked back at Meg, who was still fighting over the
: bag with the pirate.

: ěMeg, give him the bag!î James yelled.

: ěYes, give it up!î Brett agreed.

: ěNO!î Meg screamed as the pirate took her bag and dumped itís contents
: on the ground.

: A few clothes came out and to Brett and Jamesí surprise, the box!

: Brett turned to James and screamed in astonishment. ěShe had the
: box!!î

: Meg took a dive for the box, but the pirate picked it up and dumped it
: with the other valuables.

: Goodsport investigated James to see if he had anything of value. He
: patted his pockets and then finally noticed the key to the box that
: was hanging around his neck. He gave a big, semi-toothless grin and
: made use of his massive muscles as he ripped the key from Jamesí neck.

: ěNow they have the key!î Brett screamed.

: ěJames, you had the key?î Meg said, standing up. ěYou were the ones
: who attacked Webley at the temple!î

: ěYou were the one who shot him in his room?î James asked.

: ěHe was going to kill me! We were supposed to be partners!î Meg
: exclaimed.

: Goodsport noticed three of the other pirates trying to lower all of
: the passengersí valuables into their pirate ship to little success.
: Goodsport pushed back all three pirates aside, grabbed the rope and
: raised and lowered the massive treasure bundle from the cruise ship to
: the pirate ship.

: Tessa walked over to the shipís railing, stood up on it and began to
: speak. ěAttention! I would like to thank you for sharing your
: considerable wealth with me, Goodsport, and the rest of my crew.
: Sorry, I wonít be able to entertain you any longer!î With a smile,
: Tessa back flipped and landed over at her own vessel. She hollered
: something in Chinese, and the ship began moving. Goodsport gave a
: semi-toothless grin, flexed his sweaty muscles, and jumped into the
: ship also.

: Meg looked over at the ship slowly sailing away. She decided to run
: for it.

: Brett looked over at James, and then ran off towards the lifeboats.
: James followed.

: ěShe had the box!î Brett exclaimed.

: Meanwhile, the Chinese pirates began firing their weapons on the ship.
: The first mate was back at it again, firing rounds at the fierce
: pirates.

: ěIt was in our room!!!î Brett yelled at James.

: ěDonít worry about that now, all we need is a boat!î James said,
: running forward. ěHereís one!î James said, pointing to a lifeboat
: attached to the railings.

: Back at the pirate ship, a cannon ignited, and blew apart the
: lifeboat.

: ěSo much for that one! Look there's one!î James said, pointing down
: at a boat with Meg in it trying desperately to catch the pirate ship.

: ěWhere is she going?î Brett asked.

: ěHey Meg! Wait up!î James said as he climbed over the rails and
: jumped into the boat.

: ěDonít try and stop me, Jimmy! Iím not losing that action figure!î
: Meg yelled.

: ěAh to hell with this!î Brett muttered as he too jumped over the rail
: and landed on the boat.

: ěThe action figure is ours!î Brett yelled.

: ěI have no time to sit and argue, get out of my boat!!î screamed Meg
: at her two unwelcomed visitors.

: ěI throw you overboard!î Brett screamed back.

: ěNo! Brett! No!î James yelled, holding his angry brother back. ěNow
: look, why donít you climb back on the boat! you canít handle these
: pirates by yourself!î James said to Meg.

: ěWe are losing the pirate ship!î Brett screamed.

: ěMaybe we can make a deal! We can split it three ways! Thereís
: plenty for all of us!î Meg stated.

: ěWe donít want to share! Dump her out, James!î Brett motioned to his
: brother.

: ěBrett, I canít do that!î James said.

: ěThat pirate ship is getting away!î

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: : Alright!  Here we go!  Day 3 of this story's (err.. spoof's) 
: : serialization!  Here is the fourth chapter!  Happy reading!

: : <b> <u> Chapter 4 </b> </u>

: : ROB T, still holding the Lambert brothers at gunpoint, he demanded 
: : answers from the pair.  But, little did they know of the the 
: : mysterious galleon that silently crept up on the cruise ship.

: : ěNow, hold on, let me explain--î James began to say but was cut off as 
: : a Chinese pirate, fully armed, entered the room.  ROB T. quickly took 
: : aim at the pirate and gave a quick shot, which missed by about a foot.

: : The surprised pirate aimed his rifle at ROB T.ís chest and quickly 
: : fired, bringing the Indy collectorís swift death.

: : In a quick decision, James kicked the pirate in the midsection and 
: : knocked him down and out into the hallway.  James rushed into the hall 
: : to continue the fight.  The pirate struck back with a kick of his own, 
: : knocking James into the wall.

: : Meanwhile, cries and screams could be heard all throughout the ship as 
: : dozens of Chinese pirates boarded the ship fully armed.

: : Still in ROB T.ís cabin, Brett looked out of the wood slated window 
: : and gasped.  ěPirates!!î

: : Back in the hallway, the Chinese pirate had grabbed a railing, removed 
: : it from the bearings, broke it in half and with one in each hand, 
: : twirled them in the direction of James.

: : Another pirate came in the direction of James.  But this one already 
: : had an opponent, one of the sailors from the ship, and the sailor was 
: : losing big time.  The other pirate kicked the sailor and he flew in 
: : between James and his opponent.  Quickly, James kneed the sailorís 
: : opponent in the chest, snatched up his rifle and began twirling it at 
: : his stick-wielding pirate.

: : Brett, meanwhile grabbed ROB T.ís gun.  ěI hate not knowing what comes 
: : next!î Brett muttered as he went out the door and ran to the opposite 
: : end of the hallway of James and the pirate.  Unfortunately, he ran 
: : straight into half a dozen rifle-bearing pirates.

: : James and the pirate were still duking it out in the hall.  After 
: : rigorously fighting with the sticks, James dropped the rifle, twirled 
: : around and kicked the pirate smack in the face.  The pirate quickly 
: : recovered and swung a punch at James who quickly ducked.  James tried 
: : to punch the pirate in the belly, but he shielded the bunch with his 
: : arm.  The pirate swung around for another punch, but James blocked his 
: : punch as quickly as the pirate blocked his.

: : On the deck of the ship, several crew members were having a gunfight 
: : with the pirates still on board their own vessel.  The first mate 
: : fired his side arm and successfully hit one of the pirates in the 
: : head, and his body fell into the dark waters below.

: : Meanwhile, James took the fight out on the ships decks.  He flipped 
: : the pirate over, who surprisingly got back up.  As soon as he got back 
: : up, the fedora-wearing James kicked him again and again in the face 
: : and the stomach, forcing him farther down the deck.  James gave one 
: : final kick to the jaw, knocking him to the ground.

: : Hehehe... I kicked some ass! James thought as he smirked.

: : But that smile vanished as, out of nowhere, a black leather boot 
: : smacked him in the face.  James fell down and rolled down the ramp and 
: : down into all the passengers and the pirates holding them at gunpoint.

: : Walking down the stairs was Tessa, the singer and the black 
: : leather-clad figure who kicked James.

: : As soon as James stood up, Brett ran over to him, Meg was there, too.  
: : He looked around as gun wielding pirates forced the passengers to 
: : forfeit their watches, jewels, wallets and paper clips.

: : ěItís the singer!î Brett exclaimed.

: : As Tessa continued to walk down the stairs, she began to speak.

: : ěWe donít want to make your lives short.  We just want your money, 
: : your jewels...î Tessa stopped walking and looked at all the frightened 
: : passengers, then continued her sentence,îyour gold.  My name is Tessa, 
: : and this is my first mate, Goodsport!î  Tessa pointed to a shirtless, 
: : brawny man with huge biceps.

: : Goodsport walked forward (besides Tessa, he was the only pirate who 
: : was not Chinese).  He flexed his arms for the passengers, who gawked 
: : as his muscles bulged bigger than anything they had ever seen before.  
: : Goodsport smiled as sweat dripped off his arms.

: : ěHoly shit!î were the only two words that escaped Brettís mouth at the 
: : sight of this massive hulk.

: : A pirate went to Meg and yanked her bag.

: : ěNo!  Itís mine!!î Meg screamed.

: : Tessa, meanwhile, walked up to Indy Magnoli, reached in his shirt 
: : pocket, and silently pulled out a wad of money.  Seeing this, Abner 
: : stepped forward.  Tessa drew out her gun and shot poor Abner, who 
: : collapsed amidst many shrieks and hollars.

: : Brett and James looked back at Meg, who was still fighting over the 
: : bag with the pirate.

: : ěMeg, give him the bag!î James yelled.

: : ěYes, give it up!î Brett agreed.

: : ěNO!î Meg screamed as the pirate took her bag and dumped itís contents 
: : on the ground.

: : A few clothes came out and to Brett and Jamesí surprise, the box!

: : Brett turned to James and screamed in astonishment.  ěShe had the 
: : box!!î

: : Meg took a dive for the box, but the pirate picked it up and dumped it 
: : with the other valuables.

: : Goodsport investigated James to see if he had anything of value.  He 
: : patted his pockets and then finally noticed the key to the box that 
: : was hanging around his neck.  He gave a big, semi-toothless grin and 
: : made use of his massive muscles as he ripped the key from Jamesí neck.

: : ěNow they have the key!î Brett screamed.

: : ěJames, you had the key?î Meg said, standing up.  ěYou were the ones 
: : who attacked Webley at the temple!î

: : ěYou were the one who shot him in his room?î James asked.

: : ěHe was going to kill me!  We were supposed to be partners!î Meg 
: : exclaimed.

: : Goodsport noticed three of the other pirates trying to lower all of 
: : the passengersí valuables into their pirate ship to little success.  
: : Goodsport pushed back all three pirates aside, grabbed the rope and 
: : raised and lowered the massive treasure bundle from the cruise ship to 
: : the pirate ship.

: : Tessa walked over to the shipís railing, stood up on it and began to 
: : speak.  ěAttention!  I would like to thank you for sharing your 
: : considerable wealth with me, Goodsport, and the rest of my crew.  
: : Sorry, I wonít be able to entertain you any longer!î  With a smile, 
: : Tessa back flipped and landed over at her own vessel.  She hollered 
: : something in Chinese, and the ship began moving.  Goodsport gave a 
: : semi-toothless grin, flexed his sweaty muscles, and jumped into the 
: : ship also.

: : Meg looked over at the ship slowly sailing away.  She decided to run 
: : for it.

: : Brett looked over at James, and then ran off towards the lifeboats.  
: : James followed.

: : ěShe had the box!î Brett exclaimed.

: : Meanwhile, the Chinese pirates began firing their weapons on the ship.  
: : The first mate was back at it again, firing rounds at the fierce 
: : pirates.

: : ěIt was in our room!!!î  Brett yelled at James.

: : ěDonít worry about that now, all we need is a boat!î  James said, 
: : running forward.  ěHereís one!î James said, pointing to a lifeboat 
: : attached to the railings.

: : Back at the pirate ship, a cannon ignited, and blew apart the 
: : lifeboat.

: : ěSo much for that one!  Look there's one!î  James said, pointing down 
: : at a boat with Meg in it trying desperately to catch the pirate ship.

: : ěWhere is she going?î  Brett asked.

: : ěHey Meg!  Wait up!î James said as he climbed over the rails and 
: : jumped into the boat.

: : ěDonít try and stop me, Jimmy!  Iím not losing that action figure!î  
: : Meg yelled.

: : ěAh to hell with this!î  Brett muttered as he too jumped over the rail 
: : and landed on the boat.

: : ěThe action figure is ours!î  Brett yelled.

: : ěI have no time to sit and argue, get out of my boat!!î screamed Meg 
: : at her two unwelcomed visitors.

: : ěI throw you overboard!î Brett screamed back.

: : ěNo!  Brett! No!î James yelled, holding his angry brother back.  ěNow 
: : look, why donít you climb back on the boat!  you canít handle these 
: : pirates by yourself!î  James said to Meg.

: : ěWe are losing the pirate ship!î  Brett screamed.

: : ěMaybe we can make a deal!  We can split it three ways!  Thereís 
: : plenty for all of us!î Meg stated.

: : ěWe donít want to share!  Dump her out, James!î  Brett motioned to his 
: : brother.

: : ěBrett, I canít do that!î  James said.

: : ěThat pirate ship is getting away!î

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