Twisted but hilarious!! (nm)

Posted by Brett (Maverick) Lambert from firewall-01.stfx.com on October 15, 1999 at 06:59:29:

In Reply to: The real ending of Raiders posted by Artman on October 15, 1999 at 00:21:59:

: Technically, should'nt Raiders have ended like this?
: KapitanLeutnant Karl Doenitz submarine report:(translated from the german)
: Upon arriving at our secret location, we were surprised to find the waterlogged corpse of Doctor Jones affixed to the top of our submarine. Obviously, when we dived it was either the intense underwater pressure or suffocation by drowning that killed the man but the crew and I were amazed that throughout the whole undersea journey his death grip on the hatch held fast; and though parts of his flesh and clothing were ripped away his facial features and basic frame had amazingly managed to remain intact. The grimace expression on his face was that of a man who had realized that hitching a ride onto a submarine in the middle of the ocean was maybe not a good idea. Of the female captive we were transporting, on observing the corpse had only one comment. It was "Typical". He also had on him a water proof notebook that, among other things warned us to not look at the glories of the Ark of the Covenant once opened. This saved a lot of lives. Along with the Ark, the whip he was carrying will make a beautiful gift to the Fuhrer as he likes those sort of things.
: Heil!!!

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: : Technically, should'nt Raiders have ended like this?
: : KapitanLeutnant Karl Doenitz submarine report:(translated from the german)
: : Upon arriving at our secret location, we were surprised to find the waterlogged corpse of Doctor Jones affixed to the top of our submarine. Obviously, when we dived it was either the intense underwater pressure or suffocation by drowning that killed the man but the crew and I were amazed that throughout the whole undersea journey his death grip on the hatch held fast; and though parts of his flesh and clothing were ripped away his facial features and basic frame had amazingly managed to remain intact. The grimace expression on his face was that of a man who had realized that hitching a ride onto a submarine in the middle of the ocean was maybe not a good idea. Of the female captive we were transporting, on observing the corpse had only one comment. It was "Typical". He also had on him a water proof notebook that, among other things warned us to not look at the glories of the Ark of the Covenant once opened. This saved a lot of lives. Along with the Ark, the whip he was carrying will make a beautiful gift to the Fuhrer as he likes those sort of things.
: : Heil!!!

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